Good Advice #1: New Years, let's face it, is a holiday designed to let people feel free to get drunk. So, considering our UNdrunkedness status how do you have fun on this upcoming night without getting arrested? I'll tell you how. Did you think about playing a game of 90s Trivia? This will lead to hours of fun just "Trivia-ing" and laughing with your friends/family. Yes, beating your husbands on a girls vs. guys board game is fun. Making your prize for winning a girls trip (cuz of course you are gonna win) is even MORE fun.
Some of the things that I have done that were the most fun were quite simple...and legal. It's not so much what you do, but how you do it. It's all in the approach. Yes, watching the ball drop in NYC on TV is fun. Standing up and doing the running man in front of Ryan Seaacrest is even MORE fun. If you really feel like getting crazy, get a 2 liter bottle of Diet Coke (just for yourself). Pretty soon you may find yourself making "shadow puppets" on the wall. Because if I am somewhere on New Years, I am having fun... and very few things have ever involved sitting in a Police Cruiser at 3:30 AM, giving fake names, and acting like you are just as confused as the officer is.Good Advice #2: Old cars are the best. For many reasons. You don't have a car payment. You don't feel the urge to wash it on any sort of regular basis. Your kid wants to eat his ice cream in the back seat while you are on to your next errand? No problem! You children consider the third row benches a trash can? Who cares! You use the mini-van as your own personal office (including papers, books, magazines, digital equipment)? Si claro! So, my advice to you is this. Keep your family car until it is getting run in to the ground. You will be a much happier person to live with and plus the other mommies won't be in danger of breaking that darn "covet" commandment. Cuz no one is coveting your life while you are driving it isallimsayin.
Now it's your turn my friends. Let me impart of you my wisdom. I will be answering via my iphone cuz I'm off to the New Years capital of the world--Las Vegas to see Jespy and her fam!!! (<-crap there goes the covet thing)
6 comments:
No one covets your van when you have to open your door at the drive thru cuz your driver's side window doesn't go down?? Weird.
Dear AskMemzy,
As far as all the deadly sins go, how bad is coveting... I mean really? Cuz I've been dealing with it as soon as I found out you were flouncing off to Vegas. Do I need to talk to my Bish about it? I'm confused as to how to proceed.
InTheFetalPositionInDenvah.
With ya on the car thing. One of my friends got her purse and christmas gifts stolen after they broke the window of her new Lexus SUV.
Sam doesn't even bother to lock the 1999 Daewoo, which looks like a hunk-o-junk. Not that he leaves much in there, but the stereo, which may be worth more than the car, is still there. :0)
Have fun in Vegas. We're seriously covetous about that.
How late does a senior citizen need to stay up on New Year's Eve if they want to hold their heads up in the community?
We OWN our Suzuki XL-7. Flat out OWN that squeaky-breaked baby. Covet much?
We are SO gonna win that high-stakes 90s trivia game, cuz Tony only knows two things: drugs (legal ones) and pennies. That's it. Cruise to Ensanada? Or backpacking through Europe?
L--its not too late to book your gizes flights. Who cares if Gty's not my cousin? Not me. Two words: Trundle bed. All made up with clean sheets just in case.
Anyways, Dear AskMemzy,
Are you judgy of dirty baseboards and chipped paint?
LilBitWorriedinLV
Landee-I got that window fixed tyvm. And that covet thing needs to give your bush a call if you are wanting to take a "happy pill" to ease the pain.
Mary-- you are not a we senior citizen. That being said, 9:30 is respectable.
LilBitWorried--you HAVE been to my house, right? No judgy judgedson here. ::making huge whew action::
Happy New year! What?!?! Jespy's house? I have been going there for years...the best place to be on New Years Eve, I tell you. I am coveting too.
Good advice about the minivan. Oh, you mean you weren't talking about my filthy trashcan/office? I suddenly feel proud of my mess, all thanks to you.
Question-Will you tell Jespy "hi" for me? I miss her.
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