Tuesday, February 17, 2009

TUNE IN TUESDAY

Just this morning my kid says to me, "Mom, you are the smartest person in the world." Now, granted I was just informing him which shoe goes on which foot but the boy has a point. Dontcha think? Kids have a sick sense about these things. And yes, I said "sick" on purpose instead of "sixth". Wordplay. I'm pretty much like a dictionary anyway,...........a Memzified one but still.

Are you gize still listening?

Good Advice #1: Don't ever try to buy a house slash move and expect to get any "normal life" stuff done successfully. It's UNpossible. I've half-heartedly convinced everyone around me that life is continuing forward as planned and just on the side I am trying to move. HA!! Using my smartness and good sense I decided to pretend no longer. Not only is my laundry behind, my children going hungry, and my quordy scores threatened,.......but I'm pretty sure I haven't wiped off my iphone screen in, like, 4 days. ::audible gasp from iphone users:: And..............come closer cuz I'm gonna whisper this one.........I haven't been to the gym in 4 days. I know, I know. And you gize know that I'm like in perfect shape and stuff. Practically an olympic athlete. (I shouldn't have to put the haha in there right?) My point is, that my brain is mush with all of the house possibilities bouncing around in there---we're at square one cuz the offer we made didn't "take"---and my body isn't exactly picking up the pieces where my brain's left off.



Good Advice #2: If you are staying at a Holiday Inn and happen to have a hankering for some Mickey Dee's......don't come dressed ONLY in your Holiday Inn robe.





Cuz this could be YOU you gize. I personally asked for a side of "What the H?!!" (and when I say "H" I mean "heck") with my nuggets when I saw this. But that's just me.

So it's your turn now. Hit me. And hit me hard cuz I need a challenge and stuff.

15 comments:

Hazel said...

I did not know you were buying a house. What else have I missed. And that bathrobe guy...you should have said something. That is sixth! (Sixth applied for the job of sick, and was well qualified, don't you think?)

Question: How long can you go without unpacking your s* (and by s* I mean stuff) before you appear lazy, and unmotivated?

Br Boys said...

How do I get rid of post Disney cruise depression and move on with my life?
Signed, Out of Pixie Dusk in Bako

ManicMandee said...

We're supposed to be moving into our new home any time now. You wouldn't have a clue by the looks of our home and our day to day lives.
You need to tell us more details about your house deals and such. It's a big deal and you just barely talk about it in passing.
And that guy in the bathrobe looks just like my brother in-law Jay. Were you in Bako? I have some investigating to do.

Question:
Any tricks to hide or get rid of pizza face aka acne?

Amber Waite said...

Hey Memzy. I'm stumped and I'm hoping you can help. Not that your kids would EVER do this but my chillens have crayolad ALL over their bedroom walls. I've tried almost everything I can think of to remove it; bleach, comet, magic erase pads. And the only thing I've managed to accomplish is scratching the paint off and tiring my arm out big time. What do you suggest? Is there some secret trick I don't know about?

kristi said...

Dear Memzy,

So what do you do when your 2 year old (!) insists on watching HSM or Hannah Montanna EVERYday and cries, screams and hits if her wish is not granted? It's pushing me over the edge. I never dreamed the princess could be so un-princessy.

Signed,
So over Disney 'Tween Movies

Memzy said...

Katie--Sixth. It's perfect. And you don't EVER have to unpack. Just shove it into the closet and ever so nonchalantly close the door. That being said, if you have a significant other it would be about 11.4 days before the "unmotivated" starts rearing it's ugly head.

Pixie Dust Girl--First, I'm so glad you had fun and I'm dying to hear about it. I like to call these moments PVD (post vacation depression). It is cureable but usually only with time and LOTS of Diet Coke and chocolate. And throw in a little American Idol and you'll be good to go in no time.

MM--There's just too many factors/deets up in the air to ramble on and on about it all the time. Once we have a house, an offer is made, one is accepted, and then we get close to closing....I suppose I can spill my beans. But right now there is just too much muddling up my brain as it is. I find it VERY hard to believe you have "pizza face". Your version of acne is me on a good day I'm guessing. But the best idea I have to hide it is a healthy dose of paper bag head.

Amber--I was going to suggest Mr Clean Magic Erasers but it sounds like even THAT didn't work. ::gasp:: In that case there's only one true solution to this problem. PAINT. It's so unfortunate and yet so effective. I would suggest a nice shade of black. Then they can color all they want and you won't even notice.

Memzy said...

Disney 'Tween Movie Lady--I might not be the best one to ask since I watched the entire new Nickelodeon movie "Spectacular" with my kids yesterday. (total HSM knock off but who doesn't love choreography and zip up hoodies mixed together right?) Just get out the powdered sugar and entice her away from the television with a promise of a spoonful. Then unplug it while she isn't looking and claim it's "broken". That's not really a lie so much as the ugly truth in sheeps clothing.

Urmston Family said...

Was so great to see you the other night. I love your advice and my question is what should I do with my 4 year old who loves to play lego star wars. I noticed you also have a little one that enjoys the same game. He plays it constantly.

Emily said...

Your great advice never disapoint.

I'm questionless...

Kristin said...

I'm pretty sure there is something rancid in my fridge. How do I muster the strength to clean out my fridge? Or, better yet, how long do you think it will take to completely decompose (sp) by itself.

Memzy said...

Urmston Girlie--So fun to see you too. I wish we ran into eachother more often. You are saying playing Lego Star Wars constantly is a problem?

Kristin--3 months, give or take a couple of weeks. The only problem I foresee with that is your hubby might mistake that food for something edible and then get sick which would mean you would be a single mom for days. No one wishes that on you. So, just grab your oldest son and do a sniff test with him. Yup..........that'll work.

E said...

That Holiday Inn Guy was clearly having a spa day.

My question: How should I spend the extra $16 a month we will eventually save when the tax break portion of the stimulous package kicks in? And don't suggest anything lamerz, like paying off debt. I wanna really blow it like a rockstar, stimulate my economy and stuff.

Memzy said...

Economy Stimulator--I've got it. 12 packages of FUN DIP to hand out to other people's kids just as they are leaving your house. You'll be the coolest mom-friend EVER. Plus, I heard Fun Dip is going under so you'd save some jobs.

Elder Jack Anderson said...

Scenario:

Kid One "punches" or "lands on" Kid Two (different stories depending on who is telling it) and gives Kid Two a bloody nose.

How long do I need to wait before getting mad at Kid Two for not leaning his head back and dripping blood all over the carpet? I mean, isn't that just common sense? Can I lecture while he's still on the floor crying? Should I wait until later when the pain has subsided? Obviously I've already done one of these two options.... I just need to know if I made the right call.

Needing to Lecture in Denver.

Memzy said...

Well, blood is really hard to get out of the carpet so I think a little "why are you bleeding all over the carpet?!" is in order followed quickly by a "are you alright?". I mean.....

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